Where are you God?

by Shiu Lan
Nineteenth Sunday in Ordinary Time

1 Kings 19:9A, 11-13A

Romans 9:1-5

Matthew 14:22-33

On the night after Jesus feeds the crowd with the fives loaves and two fish when the faith of Jesus’ disciples should have been strengthened, their faith towards Jesus is not steadfast. When Peter sees Jesus walking toward them on the sea, with His reassurance that “It is I; do not be afraid”, Peter still answers, “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water” (Mt 14:27-28). Then Peter indeed gets out of the boat, starts walking on the water, and comes toward Jesus. But as soon as he notices the strong wind, he loses faith, becomes frightened and begins to sink. As he begins to sink, he cries out, “Lord, save me!” (Mt 14:30).

The disciples said, “Truly you are the son of God” after witnessing the miracles of Jesus walking on the sea and calming the storm (Mt 14:33). It is easy for us to say the same if our prayers are answered and the favours we ask for are granted. But what if we do not hear anything?

Reflecting on our own circumstances, are we like Peter when we encounter a storm in our life that puts us at risks and threatens to overturn the serenity of the little universe around us? When our own life or the life of someone we love is at stake, when we cry out, “Lord, save me!” and hear no answer, will we ask, “Where are you God? Have you forsaken me?” When our faith staggers, let us remember to turn to the first reading for encouragement, the prophet Elijah hears the Lord not in the wind, in the earthquake, nor in the fire, but in the sound of sheer silence thereafter. We must surrender our whole being to God, submit ourselves to His Holy will and His plan for us in order to hear God speaking to us in the silence.